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peace
Jonathan

It's late and I think I had too much coffee

It's 12:39 in the morning and I can't sleep. I'm at Lauren and I's new dinner table we found outside by our dumpster, picking up some free wifi off one of our neighbors somewhere in our complex. We are now a 10min walk from campus down the road on Big Bend which is sweet in the sense that it's convenient for Lauren and I don't have to buy a parking pass. Paquita (our black and white tuxedo kitty from OR, Thanks Vince & Lisa)(full name is Paquita Reina) is getting big and she's going through what Lauren calls here insane stage.

But we have almost settled into our apartment. It feels like home and it's nice. We don't have to get internet because we are right next to school and aparrently someone around here is cool we me jumping on their internet from time to time, :D how sweet of them. But yeah Lauren got her job back at the University Center on campus and also landed a job at a local sandwhich shop down the street, which she is excited about. I got my job at Apple back, which was relieving. I'm trying to ride my bike as much as possible so as to save money and the environment and keep myself in shape as I settle back into school and what not. It seems like it's going to be a pretty straight forward semester which will be nice. My sister just moved into the dorms at Webster today so it's going to be exciting to see her around, which means we'll get to hang out a lot more now.
I'm happy we were able to get what we did done with the walk. As we were getting towards the end and I started telling people "we're walking across oregon" and their expressions of "are you crazy?" were a lot more up lifting than "we're walking across america" " we'll you've got a long way to go." I'm proud to say we walked across Oregon, 440+ mi is really exciting. Granted I miss camping and am hoping to get some weekends set aside to do some this semester. It's fun seeing how no matter how much you plan, life always ends up changing somewhere along the lines to something you never expected. I was very blessed by everyone that we ran across. It makes me happy to know that you can just pack up and go and there are going to be people that you can relate to all over the place. I could spend the next four hours writing about everyone we met and how beautiful every one of them were but it really was one of those "you had to be there" trips. I couldn't do them justice on this blog. But seriously I know it's not just Oregon that has all these wonderful people, each and every one of you reading this should walk out your doors and go meet everyone you can and welcome everyone you can into your heart and home. I was graced with the oppertunity to pick up a hiker on his way to ID to try and start life again about a week ago. Start living and living will take you on a ride. Thank you all of you for being you and letting me and our crazy group be a part of you and what little of your life we were a part of. Peace

quick, rapid-fire update

1) Matt and Katelyn are in Boise, ID researching their new project on stories. More to come with that later
2) Lauren, Jonathan and there cat are safe in St. Louis, MO preparing to go back to school Monday the 20th. Word is the cat is large...but the owners exceedingly happy.
3) I just got a walking boot for my foot. My foot did not heal at all in 3 weeks, and I am stuck in this heavy chain of footwear for another three weeks at the earliest
4) Keep the four of us in your prayers as we begin new things and go new ways.

Matt and I will have more to tell soon about our new project...keep checking!

Letting Go

Hello again folks.

Once again, I feel I should start off with an apology. We know it's been a while since you've all heard from us, but it seems as if the news of our latest experiences are leaking out through other people, and it just doesn't seem fair that you don't hear it from us first.

I don't really know if it's my place to relay this information by myself, but I know that all four of us are busy making new plans, so I'm not sure when the others will have a chance to get around to writing their own thoughts.

Here's a basic update from when we last posted: about two and a half weeks ago, we made it a record-breaking 23 miles in one day from Ironside, Oregon into Brogan...almost. I only made it 22 miles, because about a mile out of town I started feeling kinda queasy and had to stop. It wasn't long before I was throwing up in the bushes, from what I thought was the blistering heat. Lauren and Jonathan booked it into town and stopped at Vilsmeyer's store, where we met Sharon and Richard Chubbs, the owners. I got a ride back and after things calmed down we discovered they had a cabin they rent out for about $55 a night. Since it was air-conditioned and I needed to get out of the heat, we took them up on it. We ended up staying three nights, but the first night they drove us into Ontario to go to the ER. Six hours later we had all been seen, and I discovered I had a stomach virus for which I got antibiotics. It was a bit of a relief to know that it hadn't been just the heat that was getting to me.

For the record, I'm perfectly fine now. My traveling companions, however, each received some news of their own from the doctor, and I think it's only fair that I let them tell their own stories. But that was the first day we were faced with the devastating news that our walk might be coming to a close.

However, we did make it across Oregon. We stayed for five days in Vale with the delightful Moreno family, and over the next week we really got to know Vince, Lisa, and their five sons: Mario, Gabe, Mark, Paul and Vince Jr. They were literally a Godsend to us, taking us in with no questions asked, keeping us fed and well occupied, taking us where we needed to go and even where we didn't. Last Saturday Vince Sr. drove us all into Boise where we came to stay with Karlene and Matt Williams and their three children, Kaylan, Sierra and Corbin. Two days ago Jonathan and Lauren flew home, and Katelyn and I stayed behind in Boise, where we still are now, with very little clue as to where we could, and should, go from here.

The days and weeks that followed after Brogan were, I have to say, pretty emotionally turbulent. I knew that our group was dissolving, but I wasn't ready to stop and go home yet. There still were, and are, things that I needed to see and do and people that I need to meet and talk to and capture on film before I can say that I'm ready to be done. I was angry and upset and frustrated and lost and confused and sad, not any one person or thing, but just at the entire situation and how things seemed to be playing out. I don't know how many times over and over again I prayed this simple prayer: "Lord, help. I just don't know what to do anymore." I thought about Katelyn and I continuing the walk, just the two of us, but the amount of equipment we would need to carry plus safety concerns worried us. Not only that, but Katelyn went to the doctor the other day and found out she has a stress fracture in her foot. If she were to continue walking, she was told, she would not be able to dance again. Kind of a tough decision for a dance major with only one semester left to graduate. If we wanted to take the time for it to heal, we would have to wait three to four weeks. Kind of a long time to just sit around not really doing much.

So it seemed like everyone we talked to and everything that was happening was telling us gently it was time to let go. What had started out as a walk across America was apparently only going to be a walk across Oregon, which is still a pretty amazing feat, if you ask me. Still, I've been going through a grieving process. I've witnessed the death of a dream, so to speak; this is something that we've all poured sweat, blood and tears into for well over a year, that we all worked desperately and relentlessly at to come true, and I feel like it's been wrenched from my fingers before I even knew what was going on. I don't know if the others feel the same way I do about it, I know that it's been said it's always something we can pick up later in life, but I just don't see why. I mean, I was ready now; I came all this way, put the next year of my life on hold to finish this, and now it's done only seven weeks later? How does that make sense?

Thus far, I only know this much: I can't go home yet, much as I would love to, and I can't give up on this film. Not yet. I don't know why or what is compelling me to continue, but I know that if I stopped now, I would always regret it.

However, since walking is out, Katelyn and I are forced to go in a new direction. We still want to see the country, so we've decided we're picking up a car. I'm meeting up with my folks in Denver probably as early as this weekend, and they're bringing us a Kia Spectra5 Hatchback that they just traded in my old Toyota Tercel for. The car's supposed to be for my sister, but she's graciously allowed Katelyn and I to take it for now, until our travels are done. Obviously, a whole new set of problems and troubles arise, most notably: how the heck are we going to get enough money to pay for gas? But I know that we've been provided for thus far and if this is something we're supposed to do, and I really feel that it is, we'll get along okay.

I guess there's really not much left to say at this point in time, except that I know this all may come as a shock to many of you, and I'm sorry you had to find out this way, but it's for the best. I believe that with a car, we'll be able to see more things and meet more people and spend more time with them since we will no longer be weighed down by the pressures (both physically and timely) of walking. As we've said all along, it's really about the experiences and the stories we gather; how we get there is of little importance.

We will keep our blog open for some time I should think, and hopefully the others will get a chance to post on where they are and what they're doing and how they're feeling soon, so you can hear it from them and not me. And much as I appreciate your sympathies, please don't feel bad or sorry for us at all or tell us how much you wish we could keep going. I really believe that everything is turning out just as it should, even though it may not be turning out as we may have wanted it to. But as the saying goes, when God closes a door he opens a window, and all we have left to do is find where that window is. Just for the record, I've been feeling a slight tug on my heart to head to the state of Washington next, so for those of you who would still like to know what to pray for, that could be a start.

Lauren and Jonathan, I hope you guys are safe and and recovering well, and that your search goes smoothly, and I want you to know that you are both missed. Thank you sincerely for the journey that we all made together; I know that it shall be one I will never forget.

Love to you all,
Matt

Moonwalkers

Well, this morning was the first morning we were woken up not by Katelyn, but by the groundskeeper of the Dayville, OR city park telling us that we were not allowed to camp in any city park in Oregon. I guess the two people we passed who told us it would be fine to camp there weren't up on all the rules. Oh well, it's not like we knowingly trespassed and we were only up about an hour before we planned to be anyway.

We're definitely crossing the high desert now: it can be up to 110 degrees during the hottest part of the day and as low as 27 at night. We heard our first rattlesnake a few days ago, and hopefully that is the closest we will ever come to a rattlesnake. Katelyn keeps saying she wants to see one but not one that is coming to bite her, and I heartily agree. Maybe we can stop by a zoo at some point and see one that is safely behind double-plated glass.

We've been trying to beat the heat by walking either very early in the morning before the sun rises or later in the evening as the sun sets. Walking at night is a very different sort of walking; it's calmer and more peaceful on the one hand, as there are less cars on the road, but on the other hand every little sound and movement tends to set your imagination off in some directions you'd rather it not go. The coyotes howling off in the distance at the full moon don't really help too much either.

Oh well, though. We asked for adventure, and it's being delivered.

Our stay in Prineville allowed us to capture the most footage we have so far; talking to workers at the travelling carnival, getting a tour of the Crook County Fire Station, and of course the Rock Hound Powwow, where we were fortunate enough to meet Matt and Becca, and their two little girls, Olivia and Ada. This wonderful family live out of a big pink school bus that they renovated into a double decker, and they travel all up and down the West coast to shows and festivals selling their eclectic mix of rock-based jewelery and other such trinkets. Staying with them and playing with their children was a delight, and Jonathan and Lauren were even taught how to forage for food and different types of plants, so we've all learned a thing or two about how to use our surroundings. I think the most interesting discovery is mullen, a plant that feels as soft as a rabbit's ear. Plenty of it grows out here in the high desert and it's soft enough that if we really need to cut down on weight, presto! Instant toilet paper. Yes, I'm serious.

We have about 30 miles to John Day, the next big city or town we will encounter, so that's another good two days (or nights rather) of walking, assuming the weather holds up. For those of you wondering about prayer requests, please ask for safety at night, not just physically, but also, you know...mentally.

P.S. Sorry again about not having any pictures for you all...dial-up internet again.

when you try to be funny and it fails

Captains Log 62107

We decided to inhabit one more day the city of Prineville. The beings we have encountered appear to be friendly. Our night was spent squished between a shiny fire station and an in-progress carnival. We were met by Wayne, from the station, and Scot from the carnival. The sunlight in this part was hot, and I awoke like a baked potato heating in the oven.
We were able to travel more of the area after being interviewed briefly by a journalist, as they call it, of the name Kate. We then travelled to a rock show, which was not about rock music as we had thought. There were rocks on display for all to see. Muriel of Pele Creations and I chatted about the different arts of this world, and gave me something referred to as a web address for more information. That is www.handcraftjewelry.com.
The weather is hot and the crew is tired. We're looking for friendly ground to stay again for the night, before leaving for a new place to conquer tomorrow.

End captains log.

Tumbling stories

My mom complained that we do not write enough about the stories and adventures we encounter as we go. That we are too thoughtful in our blogs, and this is a resource for those of you (which is almost all of you) who do not hear from us very often. So I apologize for that, and I will try to tell you some stories, although the one I wanted to tell was the one that Matt told about Madelyn and Samantha and their parents. I think Jonathan or Lauren told the other story I wanted to.

Tonight we are probably staying in the back yard of a Fire House in Prineville, OR. We stopped by to have an EMT check out of various ailments, Jonathan's feet, my blisters, etc. The guys were nice and we'll be camping there tonight once I get off the computer at the library.

I can't think of a story I want to tell... so here's some things I learned about Oregon and things I've learned in Oregon.

If you go into a kitchen that prepares food for a number of people (not a family home) you will see a sign about how to wash your dishes. I want to get the label for my family.
The toilet paper comes individually wrapped in public restrooms and is wrapped in blue paper.
When they say sparse, they mean sparse.
Not all cities on maps exist. Sometimes, if you are lucky, they are a road. Other times they have fallen off the face of the earth into oblivion and your hope for a restroom withit.
There are a lot of logging trucks that go down the roadways.
Walking west to east was smart, except in the afternoon when the drivers are blinded by the sunlight and therefore can't see you on the shoulder.
Yelling out "SEMI!" in a loud voice means get off the road or prepare to be blown over by the after-wind of the truck.
Life does exist without computers.

Ah hah! I have a story, about Matt, because he's sitting here, and I know that he'll appreciate everyone knowing it. We were walking from...we were walking to Redmond. And the wind kept pushing us from behind. Dirt was flying, we saw our first tumbleweed. Matt was walking in front, and I was directly behind him. As tumbleweed ket going past, I kept laughing, imagining it being so monstrous as to take a person out. Matt asked what I was laughing at, and I told him. He said he wouldn't be knocked down by tumbleweed. Not too long after that, tumbleweed started flying again. Right before my eyes, before I could even warn him, it snagged the back of his leg making him stumble. Not enough to hurt him, I wouldn't laugh at that...but it did make him stumble and I did laugh.

Maybe you had to be there. Just imagine it though. Take a second to stop reading, and close your eyes....ahh..now you are laughing (unless you are Matt's mom or sister, in which you probably don't think it's all that funny...but he's okay and I swear if he had been hurt I wouldn't have laughed, and if it hadn't happened so quickly I would have warned him).

Well, my stomach is calling me to move on. I'm starving. I'll start storing up stories to tell, and not keeping them all to myself.

Clue and Marshmallows

Hi all! Greetings from Redmond, Oregon!

It looks as though our last post was ten days ago, so I'd like to thank everyone for waiting patiently until we get a chance to sit down in front of a computer for awhile and update our blog. I wish we could write a new post every day, but unfortunately it looks as though about once a week is as good as we're going to be able to do. But I would like you all to know that we have not forgotten any of you, or that you're waiting to hear from us, and that we are receiving all of your comments and E-mails and although we can't reply right away to every single one, they mean a lot and are definitely encouraging to each and every one of us.

We're taking a rest day today, to sit and spend time with Vern, the man Katelyn met on the plane to Oregon. Vern is a chaplain for the fire district of Redmond, a deeply spiritual man who lives alone with his adorable dog Peanut Butter since his wife died a year ago next week. Already he has told us story after story that make you stop and think, or tug at your heart strings a little bit, or make you laugh. He's one of the kindest gentlemen we have encountered so far, and he's more or less adopted us all as extra grandchildren. Sometime soon we are going out to see Smith Rock, one of the most famous climbing rocks in the entire world. I hear it's beautiful.

Speaking of beautiful, we have many more pictures to share with you all, but since Vern has dialup internet, I think it's best we wait to share some of those. If you're interested, I have an account through Webshots under matchez312@insightbb.com, which have all of my pictures for the first half of our journey uploaded already. I'm not sure if you have to have an account or not to see those.

Anywho, it's been a wonderful albeit rough ten days. Our hardest challenge so far came when we went up and over an old highway, 242, that was open for three weeks only to hikers and cyclists. There were gorgeous views all along the route, also called McKenzie Pass, and we took many side trips to see waterfalls, giant beds of lava rock, and we spent the night at the summit (over 5,000 feet) in an old stone observatory. The wind was howling, but we all huddled together in one two person tent to stay warm. It was great to have an entire road to ourselves for several days, but since there were no towns for several miles, we had to carry all of our food and water with us. It only takes a few days of the same meals (oatmeal for breakfast, Velveeta sandwiches for lunch, bean soup mix for dinner) to really make you start appreciating a lot of other meals you realize you take for granted every day.

When we came out of the pass, we stopped in Sisters, OR for the evening at a campground and on our next night into Redmond came across a family (Dani, Phil, Samantha, and Madeline), where we got our first showers in a week (the longest I believe any of us have gone without showering) and our first chance to do laundry in a lot longer than that. If you thought we appreciate food more now, I can't begin to tell you how much more we appreciate hot water and some Tide. We spent the night playing with Sam (9, almost ten) and Madi (8, almost 9). When they accused me of cheating at Clue they got out some marshmallow guns and the four girls barraged Jonathan and I with clouds of the stuff. I think it was my favorite night yet. I really wish he had captured some of it on film, but I guess sometimes there are some things that just don't come out right on film...as we're learning time and time again with our documentary.

That's been my biggest struggle so far; getting the hang of making this documentary. The more we experience, the less inclined I feel to bring out the camera because the camerman has to be an observer and not an interactor...and I want to interact and experience it all firsthand. I keep waiting for the right time to get some filming done, but what I really wish I could do is record every second of every day, so that we could share all of it the way it was meant to be shared.

That's it for now. Keep praying for us, sending us your kind words in comments and E-mails, and keep rooting for us. We've already gotten some small media attention as well, so be looking for us in papers and on the news. And if you're going to call us and find out our cellphones are off, PLEASE leave us messages so that we know you called and we can call you back when we get them! We love to hear from everyone!

the value of family

It seems to me that when I sit down to write, I'm left wordless. There are thoughts in my head, and as we walk an our feet pound on the pavement I think, "Man, I need to remember this to write in the blog". And then I promptly forget.
But as we were walking today, and I was thinking about how long it has been since I've written on the blog, I decided today to write about the company the four of us have been blessed in the last couple of days.
When we were with Sylvia and Dale, right outside of Glode, it was my night to call home. None of us had phone service, but Sylvia let me use her cell phone to call home. The service was still sketchy and I had to stand over the sink in order to keep it working. I called my mom and recognized how excited I was to hear her voice, and my heart pinged a little in homesickness. I was in the middle of giving her the information she needed to pass on to the other parents and the phone went out. I felt terrible...I didn't get to say good bye or see how the rest of the family was...I didn't even get a choice. It just went off. I tried calling again and I couldn't get through. I leaned over the sink, let a tear drop in, then sucked it up to call one more time. It went through and I got to finish my conversation.
We met up again with my cousin Carol Ann and stayed with her and Mark another night in Eugene. I was so relieved to see a loving face, as was the rest of the group. The comfort of family was overwhelming and we all went to bed early for the night. We were slow moving the next morning, taking our time meandering...we took a long time running our errands as well. We actually took so long that we ended us not being able to walk at all and staying with my aunt for a night...it was hard the next morning to say good bye to her. It felt a lot like saying good bye to my mom. But we took so long again running errands, trying on backpacks and other various things, that we ended up again at my aunts.
Carol Ann and Mark brought me my backpack today while we were walking. We all bought new ones, but McKenzie Outfitters did not have another small in stock and they were gracious enough to work with Granite Gear to overnight it to the store. Once Carol Ann and Mark left us, I started thinking about all the wonderful things they had done for the four of us. Feeding us and putting up with us as we are still very much beginners and are slow...
I don't know what we would have done without them. We'd be lost in Oregon, desperately trying to find someone to carry us around, to love us, and to guide us where we needed guidance. We're staying tonight about 13 miles out of Eugene at Mark's sisters. They took us is in because they are Mark's family.
And even more importantly, as Lauren keeps saying, the four of us are growing together as a family. We trust, rely and share with each other, knowing that in this family, no one is left behind.
I wanted to write this awhile ago, but on our plane ride out of St. Louis I sat next to a wonderful man named Vern. I will post a picture of him later, but he was a wonderful plane partner. His dog Peanut Butter was so cute and little. Vern was encouraging to my very nervous self. He told me a lot about his life and he listened while I told him about mine. I still get a little agitated on airplanes, I don't like being cooped up and sometimes taking off and landing scares me...but being next to Vern relaxed all those fears.
So Vern, if you read this, thank you.

Alpha and Alive!

We're alive!!!
Captain's Log, Day 8
The four of us stinky people may have finally found our hiking niche. It's kind of crazy to believe that we've been in Oregon for over a week hiking over small mountains, pumping water from (and sometimes falling into) flowing streams and staying with the coolest people ever. We're a long way from St. Louis now!
As I sit on the porch, relaxing in the shade and allowing a cute dog to lick my dirty socks, I find my heart so filled with joy because I am finally looking at the area we circled on our maps during our planning. It seems so ridiculous now that we just randomly hight-lighted areas that sounded funny or interesting without a real thought as to what we would actual encounter. It was all paper and words while we were in Webster, but now it's nothing but a giant world with fast cars and mile markers that I could swear are actually 5 miles between each other. This state sure has its share of beauty and really sweet souls. Heck, I think if I were to quit this trip today I would have enough to say about the generosity in America.

Here's my really, super, duper, short story about life in the slow lane:
Wednesday May 30
Early in the morning the four of us eager travelers were chaperoned to Lambert St Louis airport by our bodyguard Dee Goines (haha). Our send off song was the delightful and always poppin' "The Way You Move" by Outkast. Well boys, the way we move is kind of like a turtle. My story separates from the group's when I took a seat on a flight to Portland. I left the other six stinky feet to track down our luggage and make room on the standby list. Unfortunately that never worked out...as you can read from Stuck In Salt Lake. Life on the way to Portland was...boring, that is until we reached MOUNT HOOD!!! Oh my gosh. Anyway, after picking up luggage and sitting for Carol Ann and Mark to pick me up, I met a guy who had overheard me talking about my trip. I thought he had been asleep in the uncomfortable airport chairs behind me while I was explaining myself to a curious woman (Starla), but once she left he turned over and sparked a conversation with me. I thought it was a joke. I mean seriously, how often does one come across people who've walked across America. I've searched for them, but they don't usually fall into my lap. The man's name was Rick and though I wish we had had more time to chat, the one very valuable bit of knowledge I've remembered is to stop and smell the roses. Thanks Rick. Immediately, I felt at ease and comfortable with the trip ahead of me.
Thursday May 31
The four stinky people walked four miles from to beach to...almost Florence. The Pacific Ocean made an impression on me...gray, windy and COLD. :) I loved it!
Friday June 1
After 17 miles on our of shape bodies, the four of us were practically crawling to the town of Mapleton. Without breakfast or lunch our stomachs we eating themselves inside out, but fortunately we were able to salvage the rest of our bodies when we stumbled into (the most amazing shop/restaurant) Alpha-Bit. It was 5:50pm when a man appeared from nowhere to tell us about the Alpha-bit shop and all of its vegetarian options. Turned out that the restaurant usually serves a la carte, but every friday night at 6pm they serve a meal. The owners Caroline and Jim made a place for us at the table, fed us a feast of a meal and gave us the coolest place to stay. We took a trip to what is pretty well known and respected in Oregon as the Alpha Farm. It's a community-based living environment compiled of some of the most precious individuals I've ever met. I won't say too much because this should be short and you should read my book after the trip ;). Anyway I played with a six year old genius named Gabrielle and learned to "release (my) sense of urgency." Thank you J for the banana pancakes. I only wished we had learned our lesson earlier, but your words have meant much.
So...the days are flying by, but we're moving so slowly that for the first time I feel as thought I am enjoying every moment of life (including the aches and pains in my back and legs). In only one week, I have started figuring out what I really want out of life. It's good to take this time to think. I don't like sitting and thinking because I'm an antsy person in general, but walking and reflecting is a whole new world. The scenery always changes and perspective is always fresh. :)

Here's my shout out: Kate, you make the best grilled cheese EVER! Thanks for lunch.
And Gabrielle, I miss jumping on the trampoline with you.

tit for tat: counting ounces

We've made it to Eugene again and are now frantically trying to cut as much weight as possible. I've been fighting for the past 3 days to regain feeling in left hand side of my left big toe and it's slowly but stubbornly coming back. Besides audio gear which I've already cut down to the barest minimum I'm carving out everylast living flair that is in my pack. It's fun... no seriously it really is. We are learning what we really need to survive... for the most part anyway, there are still somethings that we are holding on to, give us another 100 miles and we'll gladly give it up. :D We are on our way to the store to check out the possibility of getting new packs instead of our 5 to 6 lb packs getting a 2 lb ultra light pack. Considering we rejoice when we can cut half a lb this is a huge leap. But that my dear readers is for the next chapter. I'm sad to say this is going to be the end because there have been some wonderful people we have met so far and I want to make sure we tell you all about them. But as time shrinks down on us I must run. Cheers peace and love to you all.

Burnt Socks and Other Adventures

The four of us on the coast before we began!

Hello dear readers! Sorry it's been nearly a week since our last post but we've been hard pressed to find regular computer access out here...we've made it back to Eugene in six days, which was twice the time we originally planned on, but we've been taking it slow at the start, spending time meeting people, and having many adventures.

I'll let some of the others go into detail a little more about who we've met and what we've done, but I was saying yesterday that I think with the people we've met and places we've seen so far, I could stop walking right now and feel fulfilled. Oregon is a beautiful state, and the people we've come in contact with have been so amazing and interesting. Anyone who has a pessimistic outlook on the American public should spend some time walking the country, because it will totally restore your faith in the kindness of others. Whether it's a cold Pepsi freely given at a public rest stop (thanks Betty!) or a hot meal of soup and crackers at the end of a long day (many thanks Sylvia and Dale!), I am no longer in doubt that at any time in our long journey ahead will we be in need of anything.

The other day we were out walking when we realized we had to find a place to stay soon before the daylight was lost, but there didn't seem to be anywhere to camp so we started looking for houses that seemed inviting. We saw a sign posted on a tree that said "Food Ahead" so we decided to stop and ask someone how far the food was. We saw a couple outside of their house, so Katelyn and I approached the couple and explained to her what we were doing. Their names were Sylvia and Dale, and they were living out of a trailer in their driveway since the roof of their house had been demolished in a windstorm six months ago. When we told them we needed a place to stay for the night, they willingly offered us their abandoned house and when Sylvia learned that all we had to cook for dinner was beans and lentils she whipped us up four bowls of soup, including two vegetarian soups for Jonathan and Lauren, deviled eggs, crackers, and peanut butter cookies. In the morning we awoke to a table set out for us with cereal, eggs and cheese, toast, pears, and milk. Before we left we said a prayer for their house, and I sincerely hope that the permission they need to rebuild (not to mention the money!) comes through for them soon. Maybe you can say a prayer for them as well.

There are many other things to tell, but I shouldn't hog all the good tales for myself. Our spirits are high, we've been doing some great filming, and our only ongoing battle is the constant challenge to shed more ounces. Tomorrow we're all going out to see if it will be worth it for us to buy lighter backpacks, since the ones we carry now are five to six pounds alone with nothing in them. As I said, we're taking our time with it now so once we get into the mountains we'll be able to go faster and farther.

Oh yes, I've also learned that it's not a good idea to attempt to dry out your wet socks by laying them next to a campfire, unless they're made of wool. I burnt a hole through one pair of good hiking socks by being impatient, so I'll be sending those home shortly (sorry Mom and Dad, I just realized I forgot to mention that one on the phone). The others got a pretty good kick out of that though, so at least I'm providing some humor for the group...

Stuck in Salt Lake

Actually I think Jonathan pretty much covered everything. I just really wanted to write a blog post with this title because that's what it felt like. Images of the Tom Hanks film The Terminal kept flashing into my mind yesterday as it looked as if the three of us would be living in the airport for several days, Lauren thousands of miles away with nothing to do but babysit our packs. I didn't even have a book to read and if you've ever been in an airport bookstore you know it's just not worth it. It was maddening.

But at last, here we are safe and sound. I can't wait to get to the coast and see the ocean again, and Mark was telling us last night that once we get out into eastern Oregon, the sky will be so black we'll be able to really see the stars. I am so excited to finally be able to really see the stars.

We have about a four of five day walk until we come back through Eugene from Florence. We're taking those first five days a bit slower and more methodical since it will give us a chance to really get a feel for how our walk will go; how often we'll need to stop, how we're going to carry food and water, what our filming will be like out in the open, and so on. Once we come back through Eugene we know we have a place to stay again (with a hot tub and a pool, no less!) and we'll be able to reconfigure our approach to some things if we have to.

The other thing I wanted to mention is how far I believe the four of us has come as a group in the past week. I think that without the added stress of school and classes, and the feeling that if we don't start listening and working together our dream will fall apart, we've been much better about putting the needs of the group before our individual needs. We've all had to make sacrifices, and some haven't been very easy for any of us, but in the end, we've been doing what we can to make this happen.

And, hey, look at us: it's happening!

Western Love

We are in OREEEEGGOOOOOOONNNNNNN. After a full day of travel and hanging out in Salt Lake City airport we all got to Eugene. Lauren flew in to Portland earlier in the day and was picked up and driven to Eugene by Carol Ann and Mark. Matt Katelyn and my self flew striaght to Eugene later that night. All our bags and gear made it to Portland and Lauren in one piece and undamaged, even after a bout I had with TSA about them not letting me take my boom pole on the plane. Not to mention the pvc waterproof case I made for my microphone looked like a pipe bomb so of course that had to be opened.
But any whoooo by the time we got to Carol Ann and Mark's we were dead. After tossing disk with their doberman for a good while we crashed in their wonderful shop behind their house. They are putting together a Ford Cobra which is looking really nice.
After about 8 hrs of sleep on two airmatresses and a hammock we are up and about getting breakfast ready and playing with the dog and goats once again. I'm sitting out on their porch stairing at the mountains with the warmest cool ocean breeze blowing through. Wind chimes and frollocking birds add their own mellody to this already gorgeous day and place. Now I'm off to finish my tea.

Argh Mate

Between camping, Pirates and saving turtles from oncoming traffic, the three of us stinky feet people have been a tight knit family the past couple of days.

First of all, I just have to say that this little group is definitely eclectic. I saw our varied personalities come out just in our little day camping trip. I won't elaborate too much because our habits may be embarrassing, but at least in the beginning of this trip I have no doubt that it will be stocked full of humor and ridiculous epiphanies. Don't worry- those of you who are already intrigued can read about it later in my upcoming book. haha.

Despite the downpour of rain this Sunday, the four of us managed to hike and camp this weekend without too many hitches. I remember at one point feeling as though I were on an episode of either Reading Rainbow or Barney. Within my first few minutes of leading the group along the woodland trail, a beautiful monarch butterfly flew right beside me and I discovered a turtle along our path. It almost gave me the desire to sing a cute little song, but sadly it's been too long since I have watched Barney with my sister. Anyway, we discovered that we may indeed survive this trip because we are decent with direction, can use a camp stove without blowing it up, don't mind walking in waist-high growths of poison ivy, are fine with peeing in the woods and love watching Jonathan save turtles that mindlessly walk in the middle of the road. With only ten or so hours before our flight to Portland (thanks Dad) I truly feel as though we are ready to conquer America! The only two fears that remain in the front of my mind include not being able to finish Bill Bryson’s amazing A Walk In the Woods before next year and pooping outside in a hole. They may seem silly, but they’re fears and I hope I don’t have to face them quite so soon. I sincerely hope that libraries along our trek will carry Bryson and that I might have a few minutes to hide away while the others are adding to the blog or producing copies of county maps.

After a couple of intense packing, weight shaving, teary-eyed days, the stinky feet gang went to see our last “before the walk” movie- Pirates of the Caribbean Tres! Umm…it was interesting. It’s too bad we all returned home with headaches and not a clue as to what the story was about, but I’d say it was a fun time all in all. The couple to the right of us who fell asleep for about 30 minutes gave us a smile. All I can remember about the actual film is wondering why Captain Hook was included in the cast and why it reminded me so much of Little Mermaid. Does every witch-lady become a giant and then create a whirlpool when she gets angry? Hmm… How do the pirates say, “Argh, she blows”? Sadly…did it ever. The reason I bring it up is because the four of us had a great laugh after the film and the next morning while making jokes about the more outrageous scenes and completely random characters who continued to enter the storyline. All I have to say is that I ate my foot when I turned to Matt after the first 10 minutes and whispered that I had better get to see plenty of Johnny for the $7 I paid. Wow, did I ever! There were like a million on the screen at once! Haha! My advice is not to see it. BUT, if you’re as stubborn about it as I had been, then don’t worry about not drinking or eating during the film, there are plenty or boring scenes to take bathrooms breaks.

Okay, I’m off my soapbox now and just want to wish everyone I know, will be meeting soon, or friends-to-be who are just checking us out, a wonderful summer. Thank you for reading about our rants, worries, hopes and experiences.

I love you parents (the ten of you there are) very much. Thank you for your tight squeezes, damp eyes, hearty prayers and strong hearts. Siblings, you are all amazing and adorable and keep us on our toes more than you realize!


Since I may not have my input posted for a little while and since I love giving shout outs...
Here’s to you Karen! Thank you for all your help with the pins. I wish you many blessings ;)

from dawn rises our destiny

So tomorrow we leave...

This statement has been echoing in my head since 9 this morning. What has seemed like a week has been five months. I've laughed I've cried I've pulled my hair out sworn swerved and stumbled towards now... Now we leave for what to some seems like for ever and yet I don't think I quite understand that. I read an article from Backpacker Magazine (thank you Ann) from a wife who's husband is an avid adventurer/climer/mountainer not to mention blind. In an attempt to understand the drive of the adventurous her husband's climbing partner states, it is to connect with and accept the challenge presented by the terrain that lies before you. To continue up and up. I don't think of this trip in time or difficulty, I think of it as an adventure and opportunity to be out there away from the 9 to 5 mentality and to come back to some sort of aspect of we live in this land that we must understand connect with and respect. So to be reading about all of these people traversing the world one place at a time just to take in as much as they can throws me into an anxious state of "when do I leave."
As I go to bed tonight I'll finally be able to relax knowing we have, or will shortly, everything we need to start. This documentary is already a part of me and yet no one has hit record yet. Because of time and duty I have not been able to say good bye to or hangout with all of those who I have promised or would like to. To be short it sucks and to those I apologize and I swear it doesn't mean I don't love you. Many thanks to everyone who has helped out in everyway so far and I promise I'll be blogging more as we go, sadly I think this is my third post.
Here are a few pics from our weekend adventure we took on the Berryman trail. Although 2 miles in we got really confused as to where to go in a huge field we still had fun and next time we'll have a map with us. But all our gear works well including our rain gear which definitely got it's fair share of rain 15 minutes into our hike. But we all had smiles on our faces and the tents stove and everything else worked beautifully so twas a success. Must go cheers.


Lauren and her and Katelyn's new home


Matt and I have this thing with being next to each other :D

The Final Days

We've finally at long last booked our flights! Zero hour happens at 8:30am on Wednesday, May 30th. We fly out from St. Louis to a connection in Salt Lake City, then on to Portland. The only catch is we're all flying standby, so please, pray that we all get a flight on the first try. I'd rather not be stuck in an airport in Salt Lake City for three days. However, for only $83 a ticket, I'll take what I can get.

Once we all arrive safe and sound in Portland, Katelyn's cousin, Carol Ann, has graciously offered to come pick us up and drive us to Eugene where we can stay the night at her place. Then we'll get up bright and early on Thursday morning, be driven to Florence, dropped off, and start walking. Honestly, it's almost hard to believe that it's actually going to happen. If I weren't sitting here in St. Louis with the other three right now, our backpacks filled and ready for us, I'd hardly believe it myself. But here we are.

Amidst all of our last-minute errands and group work we have left, I've had some time to read about thru-hiking, the term used for long, extended hikes of 2,000 miles and more. I guess we're not that special after all; people do this sort of thing all the time. We're not even the first ones to make a walking documentary - we've been in contact with Lee Kazimir, who just finished making a documentary about his walk from Madrid, Spain to Kiev, Ukraine. He gave us a lot of advice on what to take and what to watch out for.

The thing that I keep in mind is that each case is different. As Lee explained, since there will be four of us, we won't have to worry about getting lonely like he did; we'll just have to worry about not killing each other.

The other thing I've learned about long-term hiking is a tip we've heard over and over again: It's all about your state of mind. You can be the best hiker in the world with thousands of dollars worth of gear, but if you don't want it badly enough, you'll be ready to go home by the second week. I guess it's the same as with everything in life: if you want to make it happen, you will find a way. I try to keep this in mind as our leaving date looms closer and closer, and I'm constantly thinking about how far we've come since Lauren and I first talked about this idea over a year ago, how much time and money and daydreams we've invested in this trip, and I know we're going to be okay. Because all four of us want this very, very badly.

Then there are people, like Joe Hawkes-Cates and Vicki Watts from Active and Creative Teen Theater in Springfield, who hold an open mic fundraiser for us and raise $401 in a single night, on a Friday no less. They also donated all of their concession money, money that would usually go to their organization. There are old teachers from high school and friends from college who will write checks to us from $20-$50, and in spite of my deepest gratitude for their generosity I also begin to feel a gnawing fear, a large tug of responsibility because now it's not just the four of us who are invested in this walk; there are people who have given lots of time and money and love and support to make this happen for us and I really, really don't want to let them down.

I don't really know how to end this particular post, so I'm just going to say all that there is left to say:

Thank you to all of you who have already proved that you believe in us. It has given us the courage to believe in ourselves, too.

We're Getting Close!

So it seems that the hour is almost upon us...

It's always amazing how prayers can be answered and things can be worked out last minute. Welcome to the story of my life. As of two days ago, two out of the four of us didn't have a way to get to Oregon. Needless to say, the idea of shelling out a $250 plane ticket when we thought that money could go towards other things put a bit of a damper on our spirits. But things looked up when I received a phone call yesterday and we learned that all four of us are going to be taken care of after all. It seems as if someone up there is looking out for us, after all...

Now all we have to do is figure out the best time to leave. I knew when we set our tentative starting date that we wouldn't really get a summer break, but for some reason I thought I would get SOME sort of break. Not the case. At the most we'll all be getting maybe one week at home before we have to head back to St. Louis and spend some time getting everything finalized.

I think that, for the most part, we're ready. Mentally, I've been ready for over a year. Physically, we have most of the stuff we need, and everything we don't have we know where to find. Still, it seems sort of like graduating from high school: no matter how close it gets, it doesn't really hit you into a few days later. I'm guessing we'll be a week or so into Oregon before I sit down at night and go, "Holy cow. I'm in the middle of Oregon. And I'm walking to South Carolina. What is wrong with me?"

Our group's been doing a lot better. We finally had time to sit down and figure out who's going to be in charge of certain tasks, like making sure we have enough water, finding a campsite, keeping the camera working, etc. We've had our fair share of disputes and arguments, but it's been healthy because each time something comes up we've been able to talk about it openly, say our apologies, and move on. I've been telling people that this walk is going to be like training for a marriage, and when I say that, I'm only half-joking.

Our biggest breakthrough, for me at least, was when we decided we were dropping all pretenses about what our documentary was going to be about. Every time someone asks about it, a small twinge comes to my stomach because honestly, I don't know. I know that we've been saying volunteering and community service, but that's because that's something that all four of us are passionate about doing ourselves. But really, who knows what story our final project will wind up telling? We have no idea what or who we're going to encounter on this trip, so why should we try to limit ourselves to any one thing or subject?

I know we might look like idiots when people ask what our documentary is going to be about and all we have to say is, "Well...we don't know" but it's the truth, and the truth is a lot better than some unintelligble answer.

So, here's the deal: We're walking across America, and we're taking a camera with us. We're documenting everything we can, and when we're done, we'll have a pretty awesome film to show for it. If you want to know what it's about, then like us, you'll just have to wait and see.

"You're really walking? Like, with your feet?"

I've been thinking a lot lately.

About the people I miss now, and the people that I will miss once we start.

Not a day goes by that I don't think about Jess and Whit, and how time, space, and my laziness has pulled us apart. Or Kristina, who I've known since...before we were born. These people that I relied on to get me through the crazy times before college. The people that know my family inside and out, know me from my ugliest and most embarrassing moments.

There are those people that come up occasionally. It would be one of those horrible TV Shows..."What happened to...Lindsay Messemer, Mary Drungo, Sarah Allen, etc. etc."

I don't talk them anymore. I think of them all the time, and have the conversations in my head that I would have if I could just take the time to pick up the phone.

The same is true with a number of people at Webster. For whatever reason they are not as close in my life as they once were, and that makes me sad.

It makes me realize how much will change being gone. If things change while I am here, what will happen when I don't see people at all? I will have Matt, Lauren and Jonathan, of course, of which I can't be happier, but there are people that we are leaving behind. Their lives will continue to exist without our physical presence in them; they will go on changing and growing. Will our lives grow even further apart?

I wish I had enough time and a big enough heart for all the people I think about.

And just think, of all the people we meet along the way. We will, literally, walk in and out of their lives in such a short time. How quick and momentary. We met a biker on the street today walking to church, and he is but a couple of minutes in time. But I remember his enthusiasm about our journey, and the bike he was riding, and the excitement he had in his eyes as he thought about if he could do something like this. "I bike ten miles a day..." he said.

We met people yesterday as well, walking down to the Loop, about a 12 mile roundtrip journey. I was surprised at how friendly and open everyone we encountered was. I think the only rude thing that happened was actually in the Loop, when two clowns kept honking hand-held horns at us because they couldn't see the group of prom-goers getting off a bus to go in a restaurant. Our backpacks were too tall.

The people that seemed to be the most inclined to talk to us were teenagers. Uninhibited, nothing to lose, curiosity lapping at their tongue, they'd stop us on the street and be blunt. "You're really walking? Like, with your feet?"

Yes, we plan to walk with our feet.

And our feet held up, walking that much yesterday. Socks that contain no cotton and are completely synthetic work well to keep the sweat and friction low, leaving less opportunity to blister. Breathable shoes helped too.

But, back to where I started, there are people that I miss now, and people I know I will miss, and that's a lot of missing to do. If I don't say it later, let me say it now.

I love you, and I miss you.

Don't Quit

It might be a bit of an understatement to say that things haven't been the best around here lately. We're all stretched pretty thin with school and work and family responsibilities, that just finding one hour for us to all get together and catch up has been nearly impossible. Rather than another long diatribe and what I'm anxious about today (which is pretty much everything), I thought I would share this poem. It's a sappy one, I know, but it came to mind today when I was swimming laps and thinking about everything that seems to be working against us right now.

Don't quit when the tide is lowest, for it's just about to turn;
Don't quit over doubts and questions, for there's something you may learn.
Don't quit when the night is darkest, for it's just a while 'til dawn;
Don't quit when you've run the farthest, for the race is almost won.
Don't quit when the hill is steepest, for your goal is almost nigh;
Don't quit, for you're not a failure
Until you fail to try.

I was talking the other day to Webster's Director of Residential Life, Mr. John Buck, and he made a very good observation for me that I hadn't thought of until he said it. What he said was that, for us, this walk has already begun. We've started it. Maybe not literally, but in our minds, we're already on the journey. Realizing that has been a big help; I think just because it makes it easier to know that it's not always looming over our heads as a "it's coming!" sort of thing, but that's already here. For some reason, that's strangely comforting to me.
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On another note:

We finally have a way to make donations possible! Our website now has a "Support Us" tab, with directions of to whom a mail a check or money order may be mailed. We've posted more of our route, and this weekend we're going camping for the first time as a group. Let's hope we can all learn how to use the backpacking stove, or else we'll all be eating berries for dinner....

I received my REI membership card in the mail today.

Our Light

Over the past summer I had a very philosophical and romantic conversation with a friend about our lives. As we lay on our backs and stared up at the abundance of stars in the night sky, we realized that long after we are gone, somewhere out in the giant universe our light will continue to travel. By our light I mean the light that is reflected off of all of us. It's a light that was created by the sun, has been reflected off of me and has been traveling the universe for 21 years now.

Recently, while studying for an astronomy exam I found this in my book:
Light always travels at the same speed, so your own light (light that you emit or reflect) is always moving ahead of you at the speed of light. All other observers will also see your light moving at the speed of light–and because it is moving ahead of you...

In regard to the tragedies that have been occurring around the world in the past few days (especially within my circle of friends, Virginia Tech and the bombings in Iraq) the conversation with my friend continues to come to mind. To me it's a kind of reminder that, if nothing else, we will have permanence somewhere in the universe.

The Two I Met

This evening has been a success! I met two very cool people this evening and feel more confident about our trip now more than ever.

While running late to my 5:30pm documentary class (nothing new) I had remembered that documentary director, Frank Popper (Can Mr. Smith Get to Washington Anymore?) was guest speaking. Now perhaps you've never heard of this fellow, but I was totally thrilled. I've been trying to see his documentary about politician Jeff Smith, since I first saw a flyer forever and a half ago. It seemed that every time I made the effort to see the film in theaters or at a school showing something would come up and prevent me from seeing it. WELL NOT TONIGHT. Not only did I see the film, but met the director. I must say...to get such positive feedback about our endeavors from other documentarians is a real honor and energizer. Sometimes I feel as though I AM too close to our project already and need to take a step back just to realize what the four of us have done so far in our planning. Yes, we're behind with some details, but we're learning as we go and that's what's important. We really have come quite a ways in our planning...it's just that we're taking on America and it's a pretty big bite.

The second cool person I met this evening was Debbie Schachner. I have to thank Rachel Davis for sharing an article from the Bellville paper about Debbie and her walk across America. She has been walking on and off for a few years across the American Discovery Trail to raise money to build a library in Kenya. Visit her site at www.walkingwithfaith.com to learn more about her and her adventure. It's truly humbling to read about an individual who has devoted so much of her life to a cause that she is very passionate about. Debbie supports herself financially and all of the donations she receives go toward the fund for the library, which I believe is amazing. I spoke with her over the phone tonight and got completely tongue twisted.

It's a very odd feeling...talking to someone on the phone who is doing something out of the ordinary that you yourself will be doing very soon. I suppose that between Frank and Debbie, I have finally realized that my summer plans are...yeah...walking across the United States. lol. I can't really believe that I've typed it this long and it's only now sinking into my brain.

I had so many questions lined up to ask each one of my new friends and yet couldn't really get anything out. I'm simply in awe of what some people do with their lives. I can't wait to meet more and listen to their stories.

Please, if you get a chance...rent Frank Popper's Can Mr. Smith Get to Washington Anymore? and visit Debbie Schachner's website www.walkingwithfaith.com

On a lighter note...(or, Earnest Confessions)

I have a confession to make. Two, actually. The first is just embarrassing; the second is a real concern.

The first one is this: I never learned my states. It's true. I'm terrible at geography. I'm not exactly sure why this is - maybe I skipped that day in fourth grade. Except I can actually remember having to learn all fifty states and their capitals, and I remember that I wasn't very good. We actually spent a month or so on the subject (it's hard to gauge time like that now; when you're young, a month can seem like a year) and the teacher would make us stand in front of the entire class as she pointed to each state and we had to name it and its capital. The weird thing is, my memory works in very odd ways. There are certain movies I only have to see once before I can practically recite them, and memorizing entire Shakespeare monologues for school plays never seemed to bother me. My states, though, (and my multiplication tables, but that's a whole different story) for some reason just didn't come naturally to me.

Since then I've never really had a desire or an interest or a need to learn them, and despite a few embarrassing moments in my life there's never been a time when I've felt that I've really needed to know them. So I don't. I would say that I know about 20 out of 50 confidently, and yes, Illinois is one of them, thank you very much. Really, that's pathetic for a 21 year old soon-to-be college graduate.

Obviously a need to know my states, and know them well, has arrived. It's time to stop being a lazy citizen and make myself work to learn something I should have learned 11 years ago.

So that's my first confession, and my first goal before we leave: to learn my states.

The second confession is, as I said before, more of a deep concern. See, we're beginning to learn very quickly that backpacking isn't about how small you can get things to fit inside your pack but how light everything you carry is. Long-term backpacking like we'll be doing calls for you to only take the lightest and most essential gear and supplies to sustain yourself. Naturally the things that enrich your body come first - good clothing, solid first aid kits, water, food and so on. This leaves very little room for things to enrich your soul - like books. I really love to read, and I've been getting so excited to be taking so much time off from school and T.V. and other things because it meant I could really enjoy some good books.

The real problem, and deeper confession, is this: I'm a huge Harry Potter fan, and anyone who doesn't live in a cave knows that the 7th and final installment of this series releases in July at a point in which I have no idea where we'll be or what we'll be doing. I'm also guessing that it's going to be a pretty heavy volume, so I can't imagine how I'll be able to carry it around.

I know Katelyn and Lauren also read Harry Potter...I don't know if they're as enthusiastic as I am, but maybe we can work something out where we all take turns carrying it? After all, we're a team and we're supposed to be supporting one another. Toting each other's heavy books around should fall somewhere in that category.

Then again, I wonder if we're even going to have time to read anything. Jane McKinney told us that she usually reads two books a week but on their walk she was too tired to do anything but sleep at the end of the day. Wow. Too tired to even read. I can't even fathom that sort of exhaustion. Still, I hope that somehow, someway, I'll be able to have time for it. I don't know if I can wait until December to find out what happens to Harry.

So those are my two confessions. I know one is pretty sad and the second is kind of nerdy, but I don't care. These are things I'm worried about, in the midst of everything else.

Pain in the knee

After an exciting weekend of buying my backpack at REI on Saturday with tons of help from Danny, the store manager, and walking to and from church Sunday, my Monday and Tuesday have stunk.

Sunday afternoon, after getting back from church, my knee started bothering me. I didn't think too much about it at first, there have been knee twinges since the beginning of March before our big ensemble dance peformance. I thought it was just tiredness, and needed a little time to recuperate. As the night went on, it grew increasingly more stiff. By the end of the night, I was in a lot of pain. My hope was that a good night's rest would solve it all. But I woke up the next morning and could barely walk. I took double the dose of ibuprofen for the pain and to reduce the swelling I could feel. I try to rarely take any medication, but I couldn't stand the pain anymore. I sat out both of my dance classes and signed up to see my dance doctor. I had rehearsal last night for another show I'm in at the beginning of May, and couldn't dance that either. I sat with Janele, my best friend and the other person in the duet, and our choreographer Tara, and cried. Tears of frustration, anger and pain.

Matt, Lauren, Jonathan and I met after my rehearsal, and we worked on routes somemore. We worked a bit on Idaho, but didn't get very far. The three of them prayed for me, and stayed while Jonathan massaged a tight muscle and tendon on the outside of my leg that my dance teachers thought was related to the knee problems.

I met with my dance doctor this morning at 10. He kept me for about an hour.

He looked at my knee and saw that it was swollen, so he used acupuncture to reduce the swelling. I've never had that done before, and it was definately a different experience. He put the needles in both of my knees and lower legs, then attached a special electromagnetic thingy to send electricity through both legs. He left me like that for about 25 minutes. Then he came back and started massaging different parts of my legs...there is a lot of tightness in my lower and upper leg. He released a lot of muscles everywhere, from my foot to the middle of my back. Jonathan's massaging the night before has loosened a little, but there was still a lot left to do, and still pain from it.

I have to go back on Friday for more muscle work.

Dr. Bill doesn't have a specific diagnosis or problem...there is a misalignment in my foot and some problems in my hip. The pain is just centering around my knee. I have to have a couple of more sessions with more releasing to help it. I'm not allowed to dance for the rest of the week until I see him Friday. I can do warm-ups and simple excercises to keep it from stiffening up.

I told him about the walk, and he didn't say anything about me not going or not being healed up in time. He suggested we go to the New Balance by the Esquire. He goes there frequently and they know there stuff.

There is still a possibility that Friday, if things aren't going well with my knee, that he might say that it wouldn't be in my best interest to do this walk. He did say that I should be well enough to perform BFA for the beginning of May.


I'm scared...

Matt sent me this verse this morning:

"Strenghten the weak hands, and make firm the feeble knees. Say to those who are of a fearful heart, 'Be strong, do not fear! Here is your God, He will come with vengeance, with terrible recompense. He will come and save you.'" Isaiah 35.3-4

My feet are soaked!!

Currently, St. Louis is being showered by enormous drops of rain! The gutters are overflowing and swimming pools are being created in my own backyard (parking lot)! It's a gorgeous rainy day and, now that I'm seated in my room, I'm so thankful I ran most of my outdoor errands before the real weather party began.

Okay so here's the funny thing... my birthday was March 27 (Tuesday). Last weekend my sister, Sydney, flew in from Kentucky for a visit. She came bearing gifts-one I have still yet to see (ahem) and one in which was a super-light, hardcore, stylish, green raincoat. Since receiving the jacket, I have been carrying it everywhere in my little hand-bag. THE ONE DAY I run out of my room without my coat...oh yes...St. Louis weather laughs in my face and decides to send...not just sprinkles, but giant (as big as my fist) raindrops. All I have to say is thank goodness for my wonderful boss, Jen, who lent me her umbrella. Instead of getting completely drenched, only my flip-flop wearing feet enjoyed the pleasure of becoming wrinkled raisin skin.

So...I may be exaggerating a little about the weather today, simply because I regret not having my raincoat on hand at the perfect moment. I know I'll have plenty of time in the very near future to test out my coats abilities. In fact, I cannot wait to test it out! I love rain. Morning sprinkles, summer thunderstorms, splashing puddles, spring showers, frosty winter sleet...I heart it all. Today has become one of those thunderstorm days, which has kept me from taking a walk around the neighborhood, but it is lovely to watch and listen to. Of course when the four of us are out on our big journey we'll have to stop for storms and it's actually something I'm looking forward to. With all the running around at school and work right now, I imagine watching the sunset every evening, the sunrise most days and listening the the rain fall will not be a bother, but an uplifting experience to put up with for six months. I only pray that all will go well, because after all, we are at the mercy of the weather for this trip. Thank God for raincoats eh?

The Difference of Seven Years

It's definitely been a long time since I've done any serious hiking.

I figured, it's only been seven years since Scouts, how hard can it be? I was only 14 then, when my troop and I spent two weeks backpacking through the mountains of New Mexico. I'm 21 now. Surely I can handle it.

Let me tell you something. Seven years can make all the difference in the world.

Perhaps I was a bit overzealous in putting weight on my back. I loaded my pack up with a copy of The Iliad and the Oddyssey, a few of my mother's heavy Bible commentaries, towels, clothes, a sleeping bag, water, and so on. I never actually weighed how much I was carrying, but by the time we were walking home from church, a lot of other options of what we should call ourselves flashed across my mind: 8 Tired Feet, 8 Aching Feet, 8 Blistering Feet. 8 Sore Calves. 4 Really Really Thirsty and Tired People.

This is definitely going to be a much larger physcial challenge than I originally anticipated. But I suppose nothing worth having in life ever comes easy, right?

The one thing keeping me going right now is the overwhelming support we've been getting from...everywhere. Not too long ago we were contacted by a couple, Rick and Jane McKinney, from Our Heart ministries in Harrison, Ohio. The McKinneys walked across America last year as part of their ministry. Already they have offered us invaluable advice and support, not the least of which is offering to pray for us each day, and I'm really looking forward to getting to know them more as our walk continues. Abby Heft, a Webster PR student, is writing us a press release for the local St. Louis media and for the media in our hometowns. Our school newspaper has caught wind of our project and is running a story on us. A teen theater organization in Springfield is thinking of hosting a fundraiser for us.

But the best part of all is we met with our film professor and it seems like we're going to be able to work everything out with our school credits. He told us that our Film II project has come along very nicely, and we're almost done with it. All that's left is to finish up some sound work.

I guess all that's left for me worry about is money. I know that we're going to need money, and a lot of it. Where it's going to come from, how we're going to get it, is still to be determined. All I know is that if the rate of support we've already gotten continues to grow like I expect it will, we will have nothing to worry about at any step of the way.

I just need to learn to pack lighter, that's all.

the burn

For me, it starts in my shins.
Old shin splints flare up whenever I press them too hard. Suprisingly, never when I am dancing, only when the pounding of my feet on the pavement becomes soothing in its rhythm.
Then it's in my calves.
We learned in anatomy today all of the muscles in the calve. Mostly I feel it in my soleus and my gastrocnemius.
The tingling pushes me farther.
Depending on if I stretched or not I feel it behind the knee. A tightness and pulling as my knee bends and extends, each step advancing me.
My hamstrings start to itch from the friction of contracting and releasing. The heat warms me as I walk in the cool evening.
And if it makes it up into my stomach, deep into my stomach, I know I've made it.

We've been walking places, getting up our stamina, testing the water. Seeing what problems we encounter and what we need. We haven't yet walked all together, I've been out of town and our school schedules are a little complicated.
But each of us still walks when we can (see jonathan's previous entry). Walking feels good on my body. To be moving all the time. Sometimes I don't walk with a destination in mind, just where my heart leads me. I like to look around and see how the world changes, and how this moment in time is completely special. Never again the same people, the same clouds, the same flowers, the same air being in that same place at the same time. I'm romanced with the world around me.

We walk...

So we've been back to school now. I for one have no desire to continue studying at the present moment and if I had a ticket in my hand or had gotten around to changing the oil in my car over break, I would be on my way to Oregon getting this thing underway. Matt found out over break that the two of us still need to get a tent, other wise we will be making lean-tos across America. While that sounds really exciting I'd much rather enjoy the comfort of a regular tent. So I've been jumping around on-line to figure out our best options. I think I'm going to call Lauren's mother to see what she has learnt in her endevours.
We walked home from church Sunday. 3.79 miles from church to school and we did it in an hour and a half. Matt had walked to church that morning and Lauren and I joined him on the way back. Funny enough I had to get a ride back to pick up my car but it was good practice none the less. We plan on making a regular thing of it, since Katelyn was out of town last week. We are loading up our packs to get used to carrying the load. Poor Matt went overboard I think and was in pain the following day.
I'm signing off. Hope all are well. We are looking into getting a bank account and then a PayPal account so people can donate money via PayPal or check. Ok I'm done. Love, peace

Springtime for Webster

Well, Spring Break has come and gone, and of course for us the word "break" was a relative term.

The greatest thing so far has been the change in the weather. Last week, for the first time in a really long time, I was able to wear shorts and a T-shirt outside. I really love warm weather. Winter I don't handle as well - I can tell you I'm not particularly looking forward to the latter half of our trek, when things will turn colder.

We all had things we worked to accomplish over break, and besides my personal stuff (finish reading Catch-22, start some comic books, catch up on some writing, clean my room, etc.) I spent the greater part of the week at school continuing to edit my and Lauren's Film II project. It's a short, 5-minute flick we both wrote and shot together last semester (with the amazing Jonathan on sound), and this semester we're editing it as part of a post-production class.

Working on our Film II has been both a blessing and a curse. It has definitely been a learning process, and like all learning processes, you learn both things you got right and things you wish to heck you had done a lot differently. I think it's safe to say that we are finally getting our film to a place that we both like, but the hardest part has been trying to maintain focus on this smaller project while also trying to get everything together for our next, much larger project.

It's been a good exercise in patience and taking things one step at a time. Our film teachers have repeatedly told us to focus on our Film II before we worry too much about our senior overview, and at first it was frustrating because I didn't understand why. Now I see that there's a certain order to the way things have been set before us, and certain tasks that need attention here and now before we can let our minds be completely in the walk, in the future.

Impatience; it's one of my worst struggles. It's not easy to not be worried about the walk all the time. It's a constant battle every day for me to focus on other things, like being a good RA and doing homework, things that I know are important and things I don't want to wish away too fast because I'm so impatient for the future to get here. Because then I worry, when it does come, am I only going to be worrying about what's going to come after that?

It's like that guy in that Sunscreen song says: "Don't worry about the future, or worry, but know that worrying is as effective as trying to solve an algebra equation by chewing bubblegum." I've never been very good at algebra, and I'm not a big gum chewer, but I understand the point he's making. It reminds me of the part of the Bible where Jesus tells us to calm down and let tomorrow worry about itself, because today has enough trouble of its own.

Ahhh, how true that is. Tomorrow (or later today rather) Lauren and I are screening the cut of our film before the entire class, and it's the last one we get before we unveil our finished product at the end of semester. Hopefully, it'll be good enough that our teachers will see how much work we've done on it and they'll be ready to help us get going on pre-production for our documentary, which we need to start soon.

As of now, the semester ends in eight weeks. The walk begins two weeks after that. One day at a time, everyone, one day at a time...

Nashville is my Narnia

I drove over 300 miles home today. I made it in 4 1/2 hours because I didn't stop to eat or use the bathroom or anything. I just drove, staring at the seemingly endless miles and miles of road. I had a lot on my mind. It's been a long eight weeks of being in school. We're working to get everything ready for the walk. I got a giftcard to Dick's Sporting Goods and one to REI for my birthday. We've been trying to track down maps from AAA to plan a more specific route. Lauren's writing a proposal and a grant. We're all still in school. It's overwhelming.
These thoughts crowded my head as I drove. About 3 hours into the drive I realized I hadn't seen anything along the way. It was all a blur in my mind. I could remember the near-accident I had getting out of St. Louis and the semi-truck that caused it. I could remember looking at the exit to make sure I was driving the right way. I couldn't remember the color of the trees, or even if the trees had any color. Things just flew by.
I started thinking about opportunity cost. Going back to my micro-economic class in high school. It was a concept that people always had trouble with. The opportunity cost being the next best thing you'd lose for the choice you were making. What was my opportunity cost for this walk? Studying abroad. I knew it instantly. That was what I would be giving up. Sure, there are other things I'm giving up, but this is the first one. It's my opportunity cost.
There is something so exciting to me about the unknown. The beauty of something being new and different that I expect to find when I travel outside the United States.
And then, as I was driving, I hit my favorite part of the journey. This one little section, right inside the Davidson County limits. It's Joelton. There are winding roads down and inside the hills. The trees loom and protect, offering comfort and wisdom as they stand tall. It all went by so quickly. The more the roads wound and deepened, the more mystery and excitement I felt. It was new, it was fresh. I felt as Lucy did, falling through the back of the cupboard. The furher in she went, the wider her eyes grew. At her fingertips was a world she never knew was there.
Nashville is my Narnia. Behind the roads and streets I know so well from living here 21 years is a world I have yet to experience. And if Nasvhille can be my Narnia, why not the United States. Why not that newness and freshness and beauty in the world right around me?

There's so much to do, and to be quite honest I'm nervous about getting it all done. Jonathan's setting up an account for people to be able to donate money. We're hoping it can be accessible this week. I'm trying to find maps between my travelling from St. Louis to Nashville and back and St. Louis to Ohio later this week. Matt's finishing up a current project at school that has to be gotten out of the way. Lauren's writing a grant.

Life is full.

Sigh.

Talkin' 'bout Gas

Here's a few interesting articles I read in the BBC news about President Bush's trip to South America and the world's fuel situation.
http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/americas/6430951.stm
AND
http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/science/nature/6430563.stm

They're both very interesting, especially to me. It's kind of ironic because I don't own a car, don't drive at all and am walking across the US. I'm very curious about what the United States and the world is going to do about fuel in our future. I am hoping that, in the time I do not own a car or drive, I might be able to decide whether or not I want to in the future. Right now...it's tough for a variety of reasons that would take entirely too long to explain.

Anyway, it's important to keep up with world news, so I thought I would share some favorite articles. I'm sure I'll post more in the future... relating to my various interests.
Thanks, Lauren

Baby's Birthday

I had a thought flying around in my mind this morning. Instead of writing it down, I had to take my astronomy midterm which over time allowed the thought to evaporate from my head.

I'll share what I had been thinking about as soon as it returns, but for now I want to take a little moment to remind myself that I am going to be 21 in just under three weeks. I'm growing up! Woohoo.

Happy Birthday to the baby of this walk. I'm the oldest of eight kids so being the baby of a group is a new special thing for me.

Well, I'm off to work. I'll get back to you on my thought from this morning the next time I write.

Take care, Lauren

Disney Channel Addiction

"In the average home, the set (television) is on seven hours a day, with individual household members averaging three to four hours which means that someone living to age 80 would have spent a decade watching television." (Myer, 289)

"By the end of elementary school, the average child views some 8,000 TV murders and 100,000 other violent acts". (Myer, 289)

I was studying for my social psychology class, and found this information in my textbook, Exploring Social Psychology.
Last year, for Lent, I gave up television. I didn't think it would be a big deal, giving up my typical Disney Channel addiction and Arthur on PBS.

It was horrible. I never realized how much time my television watching had taken up. I found myself at a loss for what to do. I sat in my room and stared at myself in the mirror. I had time to think, to relfect, to stare out the window at the sunset.

I think I lasted about two weeks before I couldn't take it anymore, and turned my TV back on. I needed something mind-numbing, something distracting, and another reality to take over where mine was either failing to amuse me or too much to face.

After reading about how much time we actually do commit to an inanimate object, I started thinking, along the lines Jonathan did, at how wonderful this walk will be. I do not watch nearly as much television now, for lack of time and lack of a tv in my room, but there are still those moments that I waste, turning into a lard of fat on my bed or couch. Where will TV be walking across america? It will be watching us, following us, and tracking us down. It will be behind the lens of the camera....

I'll have so much time...to enjoy life as it comes, and see it with my own eyes. To experience it. Feel it, smell it, witness it, hear it, love it, hate it, enjoy it.

Well, I have to run to class and take a test and then to tech rehearsal tonight for my dance performance later this week.

Thanks to those that have been reading these posts and commenting, your words warm our hearts and encourage us for this crazy adventure we're planning to take.

saving the environment three at a time

Lauren made a relieving realization today at lunch. We wont be buying gas/using it this year starting in May, meaning the air will be that much cleaner. Which makes me that much more excited. I love traveling, and now doing so in an environmentally friendly manner makes it that much more exciting. I am excedingly guilty of driving more than necessary, mainly because I like going places. I want to start weening my self off of nonrenewable propulsion, I believe this walk is going to give me the means, drive and determination to work towards an entirely renewable way of travel. So I challenge everyone this summer/year to find environmentally clean and renewable ways of getting your self from A to B. I know this is an enormous Country but since we normally just traveling down the road most of the time I think we can all take the time to plan an extra half hour into our schedule for travel time on say a bicycle or how about your own stinky feet. Just bring an extra jacket and mittens if it's cold.
P.S. the wheather is gorgeous today. take at least fifteen minutes to enjoy a cup of tea outside.

tip tap typing

At this moment in time there are 2.5 months 190 days and 3,238 miles between us and Little River South Carolina. For some reason or another that doesn't really bother me right now. Actually it gets me really anxious and ready to pack up my stuff, sell the rest and just get out of here. But alas we have 2.5 months of school and about 4 months of planning and work to cram into about a 2 month time span.
I love this country for two reasons: there is always something new to discover in this land (there is usually a location or brief span of time somewhere that will remind you of a country you have either seen or been to), there is about 99% of the population that you really don't know anything about, regardless of the amount of television, radio or news you consume. And that is another thing, one of the most rewarding aspects of this trip will be, hopefully, the complete lack of direct contact with the mass media. As ironic as that is being a media major, I seriously need one enormous brake. I has been a dream of mine to live out of a backpack, ever since I watched "Alice's Restaraunt" with my dad in middle school. This is going to be fun and it's only just getting started.

Wanderlust

The history of walking is an unwritten, secret history whose fragments can be
found in a thousand unemphatic passages in books, as well as in songs, streets,
and almost everyone's
adventures. -Rebecca Solnit, Wanderlust

If I were to be completely honest, I'd have to admit that when Lauren first said that she wanted our cross-country trek to be of a bipedal nature, I thought she was crazy. I mean, we were talking about travelling America, for goodness sake. Did she have any idea how big it was? How long walking it would take? How hard that would really be?

Besides, no one walks anywhere anymore!

This fact has been brought up to me time and time again as I tell people about what we're planning to do, whether it's a quizzical eyebrow being raised or a question like, "You're not taking a car?" The other day a friend whom I had just told about our idea good-naturedly quipped, "You know they have cars, buses, and airplanes now, right?"

Even as school began this year I wasn't completely sold on the idea of walking. That was until I was browsing around a used book store on the Delmar Loop and I came across a book that had to have been set out just for me. It was by a woman named Rebecca Solnit and the book was called Wanderlust: A History of Walking. "You've got to be kidding me," I thought. "A history of walking?!" Obviously, I couldn't resist. You should have seen the faces on the people with me when I explained to them what I had just spent my money on.

The book itself reads like a leisurely walk, at different paces and different speeds, stopping to linger on one point for a while before casually strolling along to the next. I am quite enjoying taking my time with it. Who knew that walking, like anything else, could have its own unique and varied history, from being the very first skill that separated human from animal, to marches for civil rights, to the modern-day walk-a-thons that raise money for worthy causes.

But walking is such a basic, common and for most people boring way of getting around it seems that these days we will do anything to avoid it. But if you look around, you'll see that as a species we are fixated with travelling. We're always inventing new and faster ways to get from one point to the other, and anymore, the actual act of taking the journey is just a slight inconvenience. If you think about it, travel and walking metaphor pervades our speech as well:

"Steering straight, moving toward the goal, going for the distance, getting ahead. Things get in our way, set us back, help us find our way, give us a head start or the go-ahead as we approach milestones. We move up in the world, reach a fork in the road, hit our stride, take steps. A person in trouble is a lost soul, out of step, has lost her sense of direction, is facing an uphill struggle or going downhill, through a difficult phase, in circles, even nowhere." (Wanderlust, p.73).

Wanderlust is defined as having a strong desire to travel, to get out and see the world. Based on what I have observed by how we think, talk, and behave, we all have it, in one form or another. It might be stronger in some people than others; more noticeable, more aggressive-but I haven't yet met a person who has not wanted to go somewhere or be someplace new, whether it was a new country, a position in a workplace, or a state of maturity.

We are constantly on the move. Rarely is it on foot anymore. It's too slow and too inconvenient. I don't like to walk anywhere if I know that it could save me time and energy to simply drive. I'm beginning to wonder now if that's why wanderlust seems to never be satiated. I neglect little moments each day when I am travelling, only because I'm too focused on getting where I need to be: to work, to class, to dinner, to a friend's house.

Now, I'm looking forward to walking across the country. I'm looking forward to being able to take my time with things, to slow down and really relish being in motion rather than always rushing to the next stopping point.

Perhaps by walking, by taking part in the one form of travel that I was made for so intrinsically, my wanderlust may finally be quenched.

From 6 to 8

It must have been when I was three. That sounds right.
A chubby little me, sitting on my mom's lap on our Nashvillie porch. Staring out at the stars, my mom drinking strong and sweet tea, and me sipping apple juice. I was easily fascinated by the lightning bugs, giggling as their little butts flashed on and off. Mom was humming softly, I'm not sure what it was. The mood was set, and at that moment, I knew.

I wanted to walk across america.

Just kidding.

This wasn't a dream of mine, to walk across the United States. It had never crossed my mind.

I remember talking to Matt in August of 2006, and he mentioned his and Lauren's idea. "What?" I said. "What are you talking about, walking across America?"

And he told me, and later in the month, Jonathan, Lauren, Matt and I sat in a parking lot near school and prayed. We prayed about a number of things, but the one that I remember the most is us praying for a fourth person for what was, at that time, their walk. As we sat in a circle, hands joined, all I could think of was "IT'S ME! I'm the fourth person!! ME! ME! ME!"

The entire semester went by, and it seemed I was wrong. I thought, perhaps, it could be me, but no one asked. I didn't have the courage to invite myself on a project they were all so devoted to. I started to think of studying abroad. Where would I go? What country would I visit? Who would I go with?

In January, as I agonized over my decision to study abroad, 3 people with 6 stinky feet approached me and asked me to go with them. It took another month of thinking, praying and searching before I decided.

It was never that my heart wasn't in it, that I wasn't passionate about going and taking this journey, meeting new people and changing lives as well as having mine changed. It was a question of is this for me, and for me now. And it is.

I'm walking across the United States, with three amazing people, and we're going to do amazing things...just you wait.