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peace
Jonathan

It's late and I think I had too much coffee

It's 12:39 in the morning and I can't sleep. I'm at Lauren and I's new dinner table we found outside by our dumpster, picking up some free wifi off one of our neighbors somewhere in our complex. We are now a 10min walk from campus down the road on Big Bend which is sweet in the sense that it's convenient for Lauren and I don't have to buy a parking pass. Paquita (our black and white tuxedo kitty from OR, Thanks Vince & Lisa)(full name is Paquita Reina) is getting big and she's going through what Lauren calls here insane stage.

But we have almost settled into our apartment. It feels like home and it's nice. We don't have to get internet because we are right next to school and aparrently someone around here is cool we me jumping on their internet from time to time, :D how sweet of them. But yeah Lauren got her job back at the University Center on campus and also landed a job at a local sandwhich shop down the street, which she is excited about. I got my job at Apple back, which was relieving. I'm trying to ride my bike as much as possible so as to save money and the environment and keep myself in shape as I settle back into school and what not. It seems like it's going to be a pretty straight forward semester which will be nice. My sister just moved into the dorms at Webster today so it's going to be exciting to see her around, which means we'll get to hang out a lot more now.
I'm happy we were able to get what we did done with the walk. As we were getting towards the end and I started telling people "we're walking across oregon" and their expressions of "are you crazy?" were a lot more up lifting than "we're walking across america" " we'll you've got a long way to go." I'm proud to say we walked across Oregon, 440+ mi is really exciting. Granted I miss camping and am hoping to get some weekends set aside to do some this semester. It's fun seeing how no matter how much you plan, life always ends up changing somewhere along the lines to something you never expected. I was very blessed by everyone that we ran across. It makes me happy to know that you can just pack up and go and there are going to be people that you can relate to all over the place. I could spend the next four hours writing about everyone we met and how beautiful every one of them were but it really was one of those "you had to be there" trips. I couldn't do them justice on this blog. But seriously I know it's not just Oregon that has all these wonderful people, each and every one of you reading this should walk out your doors and go meet everyone you can and welcome everyone you can into your heart and home. I was graced with the oppertunity to pick up a hiker on his way to ID to try and start life again about a week ago. Start living and living will take you on a ride. Thank you all of you for being you and letting me and our crazy group be a part of you and what little of your life we were a part of. Peace

quick, rapid-fire update

1) Matt and Katelyn are in Boise, ID researching their new project on stories. More to come with that later
2) Lauren, Jonathan and there cat are safe in St. Louis, MO preparing to go back to school Monday the 20th. Word is the cat is large...but the owners exceedingly happy.
3) I just got a walking boot for my foot. My foot did not heal at all in 3 weeks, and I am stuck in this heavy chain of footwear for another three weeks at the earliest
4) Keep the four of us in your prayers as we begin new things and go new ways.

Matt and I will have more to tell soon about our new project...keep checking!

Letting Go

Hello again folks.

Once again, I feel I should start off with an apology. We know it's been a while since you've all heard from us, but it seems as if the news of our latest experiences are leaking out through other people, and it just doesn't seem fair that you don't hear it from us first.

I don't really know if it's my place to relay this information by myself, but I know that all four of us are busy making new plans, so I'm not sure when the others will have a chance to get around to writing their own thoughts.

Here's a basic update from when we last posted: about two and a half weeks ago, we made it a record-breaking 23 miles in one day from Ironside, Oregon into Brogan...almost. I only made it 22 miles, because about a mile out of town I started feeling kinda queasy and had to stop. It wasn't long before I was throwing up in the bushes, from what I thought was the blistering heat. Lauren and Jonathan booked it into town and stopped at Vilsmeyer's store, where we met Sharon and Richard Chubbs, the owners. I got a ride back and after things calmed down we discovered they had a cabin they rent out for about $55 a night. Since it was air-conditioned and I needed to get out of the heat, we took them up on it. We ended up staying three nights, but the first night they drove us into Ontario to go to the ER. Six hours later we had all been seen, and I discovered I had a stomach virus for which I got antibiotics. It was a bit of a relief to know that it hadn't been just the heat that was getting to me.

For the record, I'm perfectly fine now. My traveling companions, however, each received some news of their own from the doctor, and I think it's only fair that I let them tell their own stories. But that was the first day we were faced with the devastating news that our walk might be coming to a close.

However, we did make it across Oregon. We stayed for five days in Vale with the delightful Moreno family, and over the next week we really got to know Vince, Lisa, and their five sons: Mario, Gabe, Mark, Paul and Vince Jr. They were literally a Godsend to us, taking us in with no questions asked, keeping us fed and well occupied, taking us where we needed to go and even where we didn't. Last Saturday Vince Sr. drove us all into Boise where we came to stay with Karlene and Matt Williams and their three children, Kaylan, Sierra and Corbin. Two days ago Jonathan and Lauren flew home, and Katelyn and I stayed behind in Boise, where we still are now, with very little clue as to where we could, and should, go from here.

The days and weeks that followed after Brogan were, I have to say, pretty emotionally turbulent. I knew that our group was dissolving, but I wasn't ready to stop and go home yet. There still were, and are, things that I needed to see and do and people that I need to meet and talk to and capture on film before I can say that I'm ready to be done. I was angry and upset and frustrated and lost and confused and sad, not any one person or thing, but just at the entire situation and how things seemed to be playing out. I don't know how many times over and over again I prayed this simple prayer: "Lord, help. I just don't know what to do anymore." I thought about Katelyn and I continuing the walk, just the two of us, but the amount of equipment we would need to carry plus safety concerns worried us. Not only that, but Katelyn went to the doctor the other day and found out she has a stress fracture in her foot. If she were to continue walking, she was told, she would not be able to dance again. Kind of a tough decision for a dance major with only one semester left to graduate. If we wanted to take the time for it to heal, we would have to wait three to four weeks. Kind of a long time to just sit around not really doing much.

So it seemed like everyone we talked to and everything that was happening was telling us gently it was time to let go. What had started out as a walk across America was apparently only going to be a walk across Oregon, which is still a pretty amazing feat, if you ask me. Still, I've been going through a grieving process. I've witnessed the death of a dream, so to speak; this is something that we've all poured sweat, blood and tears into for well over a year, that we all worked desperately and relentlessly at to come true, and I feel like it's been wrenched from my fingers before I even knew what was going on. I don't know if the others feel the same way I do about it, I know that it's been said it's always something we can pick up later in life, but I just don't see why. I mean, I was ready now; I came all this way, put the next year of my life on hold to finish this, and now it's done only seven weeks later? How does that make sense?

Thus far, I only know this much: I can't go home yet, much as I would love to, and I can't give up on this film. Not yet. I don't know why or what is compelling me to continue, but I know that if I stopped now, I would always regret it.

However, since walking is out, Katelyn and I are forced to go in a new direction. We still want to see the country, so we've decided we're picking up a car. I'm meeting up with my folks in Denver probably as early as this weekend, and they're bringing us a Kia Spectra5 Hatchback that they just traded in my old Toyota Tercel for. The car's supposed to be for my sister, but she's graciously allowed Katelyn and I to take it for now, until our travels are done. Obviously, a whole new set of problems and troubles arise, most notably: how the heck are we going to get enough money to pay for gas? But I know that we've been provided for thus far and if this is something we're supposed to do, and I really feel that it is, we'll get along okay.

I guess there's really not much left to say at this point in time, except that I know this all may come as a shock to many of you, and I'm sorry you had to find out this way, but it's for the best. I believe that with a car, we'll be able to see more things and meet more people and spend more time with them since we will no longer be weighed down by the pressures (both physically and timely) of walking. As we've said all along, it's really about the experiences and the stories we gather; how we get there is of little importance.

We will keep our blog open for some time I should think, and hopefully the others will get a chance to post on where they are and what they're doing and how they're feeling soon, so you can hear it from them and not me. And much as I appreciate your sympathies, please don't feel bad or sorry for us at all or tell us how much you wish we could keep going. I really believe that everything is turning out just as it should, even though it may not be turning out as we may have wanted it to. But as the saying goes, when God closes a door he opens a window, and all we have left to do is find where that window is. Just for the record, I've been feeling a slight tug on my heart to head to the state of Washington next, so for those of you who would still like to know what to pray for, that could be a start.

Lauren and Jonathan, I hope you guys are safe and and recovering well, and that your search goes smoothly, and I want you to know that you are both missed. Thank you sincerely for the journey that we all made together; I know that it shall be one I will never forget.

Love to you all,
Matt

Moonwalkers

Well, this morning was the first morning we were woken up not by Katelyn, but by the groundskeeper of the Dayville, OR city park telling us that we were not allowed to camp in any city park in Oregon. I guess the two people we passed who told us it would be fine to camp there weren't up on all the rules. Oh well, it's not like we knowingly trespassed and we were only up about an hour before we planned to be anyway.

We're definitely crossing the high desert now: it can be up to 110 degrees during the hottest part of the day and as low as 27 at night. We heard our first rattlesnake a few days ago, and hopefully that is the closest we will ever come to a rattlesnake. Katelyn keeps saying she wants to see one but not one that is coming to bite her, and I heartily agree. Maybe we can stop by a zoo at some point and see one that is safely behind double-plated glass.

We've been trying to beat the heat by walking either very early in the morning before the sun rises or later in the evening as the sun sets. Walking at night is a very different sort of walking; it's calmer and more peaceful on the one hand, as there are less cars on the road, but on the other hand every little sound and movement tends to set your imagination off in some directions you'd rather it not go. The coyotes howling off in the distance at the full moon don't really help too much either.

Oh well, though. We asked for adventure, and it's being delivered.

Our stay in Prineville allowed us to capture the most footage we have so far; talking to workers at the travelling carnival, getting a tour of the Crook County Fire Station, and of course the Rock Hound Powwow, where we were fortunate enough to meet Matt and Becca, and their two little girls, Olivia and Ada. This wonderful family live out of a big pink school bus that they renovated into a double decker, and they travel all up and down the West coast to shows and festivals selling their eclectic mix of rock-based jewelery and other such trinkets. Staying with them and playing with their children was a delight, and Jonathan and Lauren were even taught how to forage for food and different types of plants, so we've all learned a thing or two about how to use our surroundings. I think the most interesting discovery is mullen, a plant that feels as soft as a rabbit's ear. Plenty of it grows out here in the high desert and it's soft enough that if we really need to cut down on weight, presto! Instant toilet paper. Yes, I'm serious.

We have about 30 miles to John Day, the next big city or town we will encounter, so that's another good two days (or nights rather) of walking, assuming the weather holds up. For those of you wondering about prayer requests, please ask for safety at night, not just physically, but also, you know...mentally.

P.S. Sorry again about not having any pictures for you all...dial-up internet again.